Varia

Discussion in 'General Motoring' started by cimetière, Apr 3, 2005.

  1. cimetière

    cimetière Guest

    Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
    A. Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

    Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
    A. You can't, they have always been like that.

    Q. A blonde is going to London on a plane. How can you steal her
    window seat?
    A. Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle
    row.

    Q. What do twenty blondes standing ear to ear make?
    A. A wind tunnel.

    Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
    A. Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.

    Q. How does a blonde try to kill a fish?
    A. She drowns it.

    Q. How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
    A. Write "Please turn over" on both sides of a piece of paper.

    Q. What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg?
    A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.

    Q. How does a blonde part their hair?
    A. By doing the splits.

    Q. What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg?
    A. Nothing, they haven't met!

    Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
    A. Because that's where your supposed to wash vegetables.

    Q. What's a blondes favorite nursery rhyme?
    A. Humpme Dumpme

    Q. Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof?
    A. More leg room!

    Q. Why don't blondes use vibrators?
    A. They chip their teeth.

    Q. How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning?
    A. Fertilized

    Q. Why do blondes like tilt steering?
    A. More headroom

    Q. Why is a blonde like a doorknob?
    A. Because everyone gets a turn.

    Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
    A. You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.

    Q. What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
    A. The more you bang it, the looser it gets!

    Q. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
    A. Frosted Flakes

    Q. What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
    A. An airbag.

    Q. How can you tell a blonde has had a bad day?
    A. She has a tampon tucked under her ear and she can't find her
    pencil.

    Q. What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
    A. Its difficult to open the legs on an ironing board.

    Q. How did the blonde burn her nose?
    A. Bobbing for chips.

    Q. What do you call a zit on a blondes ass?
    A. Brain tumor.

    Q. Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom?
    A. So she can have a doggie bag for later.

    Q. How would a blonde punctuate the following: "Fun fun fun worry
    worry worry"
    A. Fun period fun period fun no period worry worry worry.

    Q. What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
    A. She slipped off and fell down the drain.

    Q. Why did the deaf blonde sit on the newspaper?
    A. So she could lip read.

    Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
    A. You get to park in the handicap zone.

    Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a 747?
    A. Not everyone has been in a 747.

    Q. What's the difference between butter and a blonde?
    A. Butter is difficult to spread.

    Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
    A. Pull the pin and throw it back.

    Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
    A. Artificial intelligence.

    Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head?
    A. A brunette with bad breath.



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    cimetière, Apr 3, 2005
    #1
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